Blanket Time

There is a teeny tiny section in On Becoming Toddlerwise about blanket time. It's so tiny, I missed it the first time I read the book and it's not even in the index! But I think it's a pretty cool activity and I just started it with Will. The purpose of blanket time is to begin teaching young children (toddlers) limits and boundaries. (I can't think of a toddler who doesn't need those!!!) I think it also helps with their focusing skills. Toddlerwise recommends starting between 14-18 months.

Here's how it works: Begin by putting a blanket (approx. 4 feet by 4 feet) on the floor with a few toys on it. Tell your toddler that he can play with his toys, but he needs to stay on the blanket until you say it's OK to get up. Set a timer. Ideally, it would be nice for your toddler to be able to sit and entertain himself for 20 minutes at a time, but be realistic when you first start. ONE minute might be a challenge! I started Will at 3 minutes. When/If your toddler tries to get off the blanket, simply tell him to stay on the blanket and gently move him back on. When he's on the blanket, you should be nearby, but should not be playing directly WITH him. When the timer goes off, praise them and move on.

Toddlerwise recommends blanket time should be done 2-3 times per day. Increase the amount of time as your toddler can handle it. For instance if he's doing great with 3 minutes, increase it to 5, then 10, etc until you work up to your desired time. I'm working toward 15-20 minutes. I think that is realistic for a 15 month old.

I have to tell you, when I first read about this "blanket time" thing I thought it was a total crock. Making MY SON--the little guy who's always ON THE GO--sit still and play by himself on the blanket??!! Yeah right! But I have been amazed so far. We just started 4 days ago (with 3 minutes) and he's worked up to about 12 minutes...which I think is really good...for him!

Here's a summary of what we did:

Day 1 (goal: 3 minutes)
- Put him on the blanket, told him the "rules" and set the timer for 3 minutes. After 10 seconds he was off! Put him back on, stayed for about 30 seconds and was off again! I put him back on, he moaned and groaned and stayed until the timer went off. He was not happy.

Day 2 (goal: 3 minutes)
- Put him on the blanket, told him the "rules," set the timer. He stayed for 3 minutes playing happily.

Day 3 (goal: 5 minutes)
- I think he "gets it now." I said "blanket time" and put down the blanket and he went right over and started playing. My goal was 5 minutes but he stayed on for 7. Woo hoo!

Day 4 (goal: 7 minutes)
- The goal was 7, but he actually stayed on the blanket for 12 minutes playing with blocks, a coffee can and his mini piano. I had to redirect him because he wanted to get off the first 3-4 minutes. The cool thing was that he would get up, point to the edge of the blanket and say "Aye?" as if to ask, "Can I leave now?" It was so cute!! He did this 4 times and each time, he "asked" if he could leave. I just said "No, not yet, honey" and redirected him to a toy. He was fine with this. This shows me that he's really starting to understand his boundaries. All 4 days, I have been sitting near him and talking to him a little but not playing DIRECTLY with him. I might start moving farther away next time.

Depending on your child, blanket time may be fairly easy or very challenging. The more challenging it is, I think, shows how blanket time can be that much more beneficial to you both. Things blanket time promotes: 1) Limits/Boundaries 2) Self Control 3) Obeying parents 4) Independent play.

We'll see how things go when I move up to 15 minutes! Should be interesting!

Kindergarten...Ready or Not!

It was a six month process deciding whether or not to send my oldest, Brooke to Kindergarten. She was not blessed with a "normal" birthday that happen in the months of January-June. If you child's birthday falls within those months, consider yourself lucky. No decisions need to be made. The August after your child turns 5, he/she is off to Kindergarten! In most states the official cut-off date is October 1st. As your child's birthday gets closer to that date, you are faced with more of a "decision" situation. To send your child when he or she is a young 5, or wait until they are an older, 6.

If we lived in "most states," we would not have been faced with any decision whatsoever. Brooke's birthday is November 28th--she would not be going to Kindergarten this year. But in California, we like to do things differently. Our cutoff date (for now, at least) is December 2. For many parents, this would be an easy decision. Since the current "trend" is that all kids need to get a head start and have the upper hand in life (yes, beginning in Kindergarten!!!), the vast majority of parents would wait to send their child with a November 28th birthday.

As cliche as this sounds--and I speak from experience--it really IS a very individual, very personal decision. How many times have we heard "every child is different??" Well, it's true. Every parent is different, too. Some parents can't wait to get their kids the he*& out of the house and off to school, where other parents just try to hold on to their baby as long as they can. And then there are some of us who are in between. I want to do what is best for my child. Not what's necessarily what's best for me.

There are several factors that will determine if your child is ready for kindergarten. There is no real "litmus" test of Kindergarten readiness, but there are certain skills and considerations that should come into play when making your decision. I will outline those below.

Before I do, my personal opinion about whether to send your child to Kindergarten is this: if they have the skills listed below and you have considered the items listed below in making your decision, then I say SEND THEM. Research has shown that kids who enter Kindergarten older, do in fact, outperform their peers....until 3rd/4th grade and everything evens out again. So if you're dead-set on having a Kindergarten or 1st grade honor student, by all means, wait. Just don't think that Harvard will be knocking on their door because of this decision. :-)

The following are skills your child should have before going to Kindergarten. I compiled this list from various state's education department "Kindergarten Readiness" lists as well as Brooke's Kindergarten entrance assessment. Note that MANY, MANY students do not come to school with all of these skills. But chances are, if you are reading this blog, you want your kid to come to Kindergarten and hit the ground running! Just don't worry if they haven't mastered every single one of these skills by Day 1. I would say 90% mastery is fine:

Pre-Reading/Writing
1. Write first name, legibly
2. Recognizes letters of the alphabet (upper or lowercase)
3. Knows some letter sounds
4. Can name items that start with a certain letter
5. Interested in books
6. Can sit and listen to a story for at least 15 minutes
7. Recognizes name by sight

Math
1. Counts to at least 10
2. Counts objects to 5
3. Knows bigger/smaller, shorter/taller
4. Knows colors
5. Sorts by color
6. Knows basic shapes
7. Can put together a 10-30 piece puzzle

Language & Communication
1. Speaks clearly and in complete sentences.
2. Uses pronouns correctly: I, you, they, them
3. States name, names of parents, age, birthday and other basic questions when asked
4. Asks questions
5. Can sing simple songs and poems
6. Can effectively express emotions

Motor Skills
1. Cuts (semi) straight lines
2. Can roughly cut a large object (i.e. circle, square)
3. Draws simple lines, shapes, stick figures
4. Copies/traces letters, shapes
5. Can hop on one foot
6. Kicks and throws a ball
7. Holds pencils/crayons with correct grip

Social Skills
1. Plays cooperatively with others
2. Understands how to share and take turns
3. Tries new things
4. Can separate from parents with a huge scene
5. Can sit and listen attentively for up to 20-30 minutes
6. Can focus on a single task for 10 minutes (i.e. coloring a picture, doing a project)
7. Follows directions
8. Can work on or do activities independently
9. Can use the bathroom independently

Important questions to ask yourself
- Is our decision child-centered or parent-centered? Can't stand your kid and dying to send them to school?! That would be a parent-centered reason to send them to Kindergarten. Chances are, if you can't stand your kid, they're not ready for Kindergarten anyway.

- In general, can my child get along with different kinds of children? For instance, they just don't get along with their best friend--they share and cooperate with most other children, too.

- How much time are you willing to spend devoted to your child's schoolwork? Being a teacher, I know I'll be right on top of Brooke's schoolwork. If there is a skill I feel she is lacking, I will definitely put in the time to work with her on this. I feel confident I'll be able to work with her on any skills she might be lacking since she's starting school "early." Some parents don't feel confident with that role. In that case, it might be better to wait.

- What does my child's preschool teacher say about his/her kindergarten readiness? This could be one of the most important things you can do to assess your child's readiness. I was 100% ready to send Brooke to another year of preschool until I spoke with her teacher about her readiness for Kindergarten. You will find most preschool teachers are quite candid when talking about this. They don't want to see kids set up to fail. If they think you child is not ready, chances are, they will tell you. Additionally, often kids behave differently in the classroom than they do at home. They might not sit and listen to you read a story for 20 minutes, but when they're in a big group, they will listen to the teacher. Be sure to get the preschool teacher's input on how they behave in the classroom.

- Am I over-thinking things? Many of us do that. We fast-forward 10 years and start thinking things like, "She'll be the LAST to drive in her class!" or "He'll be the oldest and most mature in his class and date younger girls!" Please. We're talking the difference of roughly a year--not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. I can name "the old-ests" and "young-ests" in high school and they all turned out fine. No permanant damage done.

At the end of the day, know that if you have taken the all of the above into consideration, I really don't see how you (or your child) can lose.

Flashback

I got this forwarded to me via email and I love it. For the record, I don't condone smoking while pregnant or many of the things listed here but this whole post shouldn't be taken that lierally. The point of this is to look at the BIG PICTURE. What this says is....have a little COMMON SENSE!!

I took the liberty of highlighting my favorite parts :-) Enjoy!

And for the record, I ate tuna when I was pregnant and drank from the hose all the time..sue me! :-)

TO ALL THE KIDS WHO SURVIVED THE 1930's, 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!!

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they were pregnant. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a can and didn't get tested for diabetes.

Then after that trauma, we were put to sleep on our tummies in baby cribs covered
with bright colored lead-base paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, locks on doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had baseball caps not helmets on our heads.

As infants & children, we would ride in cars with no car seats, no booster seats, no seat belts, no air bags, bald tires and sometimes no brakes.

Riding in the back of a pick- up truck on a warm day was always a special treat.

We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle.

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and no one actually died from this.

We ate cupcakes, white bread, real butter and bacon. We drank Kool-Aid made with real white sugar. And, we weren't overweight.. WHY?

Because we were always outside playing....that's why!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on..

No one was able to reach us all day. And, we were OKAY.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then ride them down the hill,only to find out we forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.

We did not have Play stations, Nintendo's and X-boxes. There were no video games, no 150 channels on cable, no video movies or DVD's, no surround-sound or CD's,
no cell phones, no personal computers, no Internet and no chat rooms. WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.

We would get spankings with wooden spoons, switches, ping pong paddles, or just a bare hand and no one would call child services to report abuse.

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

We were given BB guns for our 10th birthdays, made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out very many eyes.

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just walked in and talked to them.

Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment.

Imagine that!!

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of.. They actually sided with the law!

These generations have produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever. The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.

The quote of the month is by Jay Leno:

'With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding, severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another, and with the threat of swine flu and terrorist attacks, are we sure this is a good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?'

Homemade Spaghetti O's!

Brookey doesn't often ask for more of any type food unless it's candy and she's ALWAYS has seconds and thirds of these so they're kid-tested!!

Homemade Spaghetti O's
(I don't measure very well, so amounts are approx)

(1) cup (dry) whole wheat "O" pasta (Safeway chains have these in their Eating Right line, they're called "Wheat Pasta Rings)
(1) 15 oz can organic, low-sodium tomato sauce
1/3 cup of milk
(1) teaspoon butter
(1) teaspoon sugar
Pinch of garlic powder
(1) handful of shredded cheese. I have used cheddar, mozzarella and jack.

- Cook pasta 2 minutes past package instructions (for that mushy, Spaghetti O's texture); drain.
- Whisk next 5 ingredients together over medium heat. Simmer for 5 minutes and whisk in cheese.
- Combine pasta and sauce--enjoy!!!